Dear Future Whoever…

Dear Future Boyfriend/Husband/Comforter/ Whatever,

Hi! This is a message for the future. I kind of need you right now. Not because I’m horny, nor because I envy couples who have spent their Christmas eves and days together, and will be celebrating their New Year’s together…

I need you right now because I feel alone, and I just need someone to talk to.

Someone who would actually love me still after all the crazy stories, and crazy questions. Someone who would still love to hear my voice even if I sound like a dying mare. Someone who would still look at me even if my eyes were all puffed because I cried. Someone who would want me to stay even if I just shouted at a public library because I saw a frog staring at me inside a biology book. Someone who would hug me when I’m almost out control. Someone who would make me feel I can actually be loved and I am actually loved.

I need someone. I need you.

You because I know you’d make me feel as if I’m the most beautiful girl alive in the world because that’s just what I am to you.

I need you because I know you would make me feel like you’re afraid to lose me, like I’m afraid to lose you.

Oh goodness! I really need you right now. I’d tell you why I’m upset, I’d tell you why I’m crying, I’d tell you how I’m lucky I am to have.

Only if you exist right now. I just really need you.

I feel like as if my friends are starting to have fun without me, I think they might actually be happy without me. I really need you right now.

Right now.

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